KILL! CRUSH! DESTROY! (or, Help me reach out to the media)

The Giant Clanking Robot of Perfectly Reasonable Vengeance®

I don’t need to tell you that PBwiki is a giant robot, clanking through the forelorn alleys and lonely highways of the world, shooting lasers out of its eyes and sizzling the Ignorant. That’s because you helped to build PBwiki and you know it to be a Thing of Collaborationâ„¢.

I do have to tell others, however. Most will be welcomed, weeping and relieved, into its cold, metal embrace. For others, the robotic klaxon will serve as a cautionary tale. Either way, I can’t do it without the help of the PBwiki faithful. Sure, I know reporters and editors. What are you talking about? I know like a million. But I don’t know all of them. How could I? So I need your help.

Is your brother the tech reporter for the Robotic Sun-Times? Does your sister-in-law cover education for National Public Robot? Is your college roommate the reviews editor for Robots and Gardens? If you’ve got anyone out there in the mythic world of the “mainstream media” please let me know by emailing me at curt(at)pbwiki(dot)com so I can convince them to help me warn the world at large of what you and I already know.

Woe betide the unprepared when the Giant Clanking Robot of Perfectly Reasonable Vengeance®, appears unheralded on the horizon.*

Help me help you. Help me help you. Help me help you.


*I don’t know. I guess there are like two robots, and they’re fighting. Or maybe it’s just one robot, but with two aspects. Or maybe it’s like the robot from The Day The Earth Stood Still, not having a nature sufficient unto itself, but rather reacting to those it comes into contact with, thereby being either a kind of savior or an agent of punishment, depending on how a given person behaves.

5 thoughts on “KILL! CRUSH! DESTROY! (or, Help me reach out to the media)

  1. Thanks, Pluto. We don’t feel comfortable editing ourselves into Wikipedia entries like this, but we sure wouldn’t complain if someone else did. It really is baffling that we’re not there. Partially, it’s because I think the author created the first version of this probably before we were live.

  2. Curt,

    First of all, the use of the term, ” robotic klaxon” made me real happy. Second; it’s just one robot, at odds with himself, of course. He fights, primarily, with himself. He is tormented by the desire to be a true savior, and, at the same time to unleash horrific vengance.
    I wish I knew some powerful editors, but alas, I don’t.


  3. there I was reading away all like chuckling was I when then or thereabouts that is I came to the word aspects and it was then I fell off my chair backward into the valley of darkness

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